This short article first appeared on VICE Asia.
There is certainly Tinder. After which there clearly was Tinder only for Muslims. It’s called Minder—and in accordance with its site, it is the accepte place « for awesome Muslims to meet up. » We don’t particularly think about ourselves as awesome, plus one of us is not also Muslim. However it didn’t stop three staffers during the VICE Asia workplace from offering it a chance for four weeks.
Here’s just how our dating everyday lives unfolded during the period of per month.
Maroosha Muzaffar:In all my life that is dating i’ve possessed a Muslim boyfriend. The operating joke among my buddies is the fact that i’ve never ever seen a circumcised penis. But that aside, my mother frequently reminds me personally that marrying a non-Muslim would bring laanat (damnation, ruin) towards the family members. The dilemma is mind-boggling. The search and also the saga carry on.
Therefore whenever certainly one of my peers, Parthshri, came across Minder,“the accepted location for Muslims to meet”—think Tinder for Muslims—we jumped. Finally, we thought, i could bring house a Muslim guy to my mother. It’s this that I had been looking forward to.
We registered from the software because of the easiest of bios and a photograph. A couple of hours later on, we received a message that is congratulatory Minder. Right right Here had been a Muslim, halal app that is dating it intended i really could now carry on to obtain the momin (true believer) of my desires.
Listed here are my key takeaways from a thirty days on being on Minder:
1. Flirting is extremely Islamic. Really halal. It is really not overt. But covert. “You are going to be my muazzin (person who summons faithful to prayer), i’ll be your imam (one who leads the prayer),” said one’s bio.
2. It asked me just exactly just what taste of Muslim I became. Yeah, a double was done by me take too. Flavor? The application wished to determine if I happened to be Sunni or perhaps a Shia. I said, “Just Muslim” and managed to move on. As though pinpointing myself as Muslim had not been enough.3. There is no dearth of matches. And you know how guys start a chat if you’ve been on Tinder. It generally speaking goes such as this: “Hey.” “Hi.” “Hi.” “Hey.” “Hey.” “Wussup.” “Hi.”If you thought Minder is any various, you’re incorrect. Proof below:
4. People’s bios were interesting. Islam had been every-where, gushing out like hot lava from everybody’s profile. We saw a helping of some Quranic verse right here, some Hadith (sayings of Prophet Muhammad) there. Somebody had been earnestly “Looking for a Khadija in a global realm of Kardashians.”5. The Muslim dating pool is tiny. I obtained more matches from Mumbai and Bengaluru than Delhi. The pool can be so tiny in office that I matched with my colleague who sits right next to me. Their opening line: « Your eyes are just like streams of jannah (heaven). »6. The conversations fizzled out sooner than I’d expected. we don’t blame the guys. I happened to be busy meeting my due dates, as the guy I had tried my most difficult with probably matched aided by the girl of his aspirations and relocated on.Bonus point 7. I did son’t get any cock photos.
Zeyad Masroor Khan:“I have always been a momin shopping for a muslimah (Muslim girl),I made the account” I wrote on my Minder profile when. With my spiritual meter set for вЂsomewhat practicing,’ I happened to be prepared for my look for love, swiping directly on girls from Hyderabad, Mumbai, and Delhi. Within the « short greeting » area We typed “Looking for halal (pious) love.”
The individuals had been completely different from your own regular relationship software. The standard bio of all girls just read “Assalamu alaikum (may comfort and mercy of Allah be upon you).” But there have been exceptions. A 25-year-old medical practitioner had been “seeking a health care provider for wedding,” and a Mumbai woman stated to “make cash with equal ease.” Placing apart my ideological, issues, and choices, I did what many guys do on a app— that is dating swiped close to every profile.
The very first match took spot within hours. Let’s call her Zehra*. A lovely professional that is legal Bangalore, she had been trying to find “a well-educated, decent person that can balance deen aur duniya (faith as well as the world).” It was finally the opportunity to make use of my pick-up line. “You seem like a hoori (angel) from Alpha Centauri.” We waited with bated breathing on her reaction. “Thanks,” she said. My game ended up being working. We chatted. She thought Minder had been a waste of the time, but nevertheless well well worth a go. We dropped in love for each and every day.
The match that is second a 24-year-old from Jaipur. We utilized my 2nd pick-up line. “Your eyes are like streams of jannah_._” There is a “lol” response and she blocked me immediately after. The next ended up being a woman from my mater Jamia Millia that is alma Islamia. Driving a car of culture and perhaps judgemental buddies forced me to unmatch together with her. The very last had been my colleague Maroosha, who had been sort sufficient to swipe directly on me. We laughed about this for several days.
Last but not least, we failed miserably at Minder. Zehra’s insistence that “Allah may be the planner” that is best has stalled our potential date. I really hope she discovers a dentist that is religious marries him.
Parthshri Arora:As a app that is dating, we ended up beingn’t afraid about joining Minder—just nervously excited. I experienced never ever been through the gauntlet that is emotional of photos, changing photos, repairing the sentence structure in my own bio, changing images once more, etc. But we installed the application and registered, with a high hopes during my heart and wedding bells within my ears.
My bio read, “Religiously and physically exceedingly versatile,” which I had been thinking ended up being funny, and my photos had been sevens that are solid. We also set the “How religious are you?” meter to “Not religious.” We felt prepared: i desired to consume biryani at Eid, get invited for iftar parties, and also to place it to my conservative Hindu dad. I needed to swipe, match, and marry.
A thirty days later on, my app drawer is just a boulevard of broken aspirations, as no one has swiped close to me personally. Not just one. #KyaItnaBuraHoonMaiMaa
My peers, Zeyad and Maroosha insisted that Minder had been an ultra-conservative area, and that the bio should’ve simply stated “Introvert but willing to convert.” Putting my faith in mankind, we went aided by the version that is best of myself, but strangers https://hookupwebsites.org/ in the Web shat up up on said variation.
Am We super unsightly? Can I have put вЂPhysically’ before вЂReligiously’ within my bio? Is my title super long to be swiped? Is this exactly exactly just how everybody on dating apps feel? Has my self-esteem not recovered from my last breakup when I had thought it had? Am I going to ever find love? We don’t understand.
The answer that is easy based on my peers, is that I’m simply not suitable for the software, which, in conjunction with the possible lack of users in India (Maroosha’s bio appears over repeatedly), is a ready-made cocktail of heartbreak and discomfort.
Nonetheless, we continue to haven’t quit swiping close to Minder, often in the exact same girls. I’ve told my mother about any of it, who’s now making use of her connections to locate rishtas (wedding proposals). And my esteemed peers simply laugh I even mention the app at me whenever.
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